How to Make That Emotional Connection by Being Intimate

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  • peter7

3 biggest problems

If you have a problem with being intimate, consider this: A social worker once told me that people having huge problems in marriage are having problems with

  • Money
  • Sex or
  • Communication.

So, it follows that it is best to figure out how to solve those problems including the sex one.

An intimate blog could get me in trouble

intimate

As I ponder this topic, I can just imagine one of my grandchildren reading my post and letting his/her imagination run wild. So, I’m going to leave my personal life out of this article. I’ll let you read what happened when the Unveiled Wife had an interview about sex with her husband.

However, I will make a few points about things that are not so personal to me.

Intimate rituals

Twice a week I spend a few minutes massaging my wife’s shoulders and scratching her back. For Fathers’ Day I asked her to reverse the roles and give me the massage & back scratching. I thoroughly enjoyed it and decided that my wife sure is blessed to get such a treatment twice a week.



More information

Lubricant

A petroleum-based lubricant can clog up the pours. Coconut oil (from grocery & some health food stores) is a good one.

Controlling

The Good Book says: It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Galatians 5:1a. If you use the Bible as your guide of what is right & wrong, the verse above tells you that excessive controlling of a spouse is wrong.

Besides that, a free spouse can be much more intimate than a controlled spouse.

If you are a controlling spouse, get professional help. Your intimate life will be vastly improved.



Ask for anything you want

A good protocol is to have this atmosphere: Feel free to ask for anything you want without feeling shy or embarrassed. The other spouse is free to agree or say, “I don’t feel comfortable with that.”

Update November 2018

About 5 years ago our intimate life was definitely not as good as it is now.

We had booked two nights into an incredibly romantic resort. By nature I’m very romantic. By nature my wife is not.

In my mind this was supposed to be a really special romantic interlude in our life. It was not. I was hurt. The second day there I would go to the steam room without her. It was a very unromantic scene.

For the next few days after we got home, I had no positive feelings towards my wife. Finally when we woke up one morning I said, “I don’t feel any love for you.” She heard, “I don’t love you any more.”

She was immediately devastated. I told her that I thought she had a familiar spirit that was preventing her from being a good enough wife.

She immediately did a self deliverance. In the next few days she tried really hard to please me in an intimate way.

A few days after the devastating message I told her I loved her. That was absolute music to her ears.

We’ve had a phenomenally delightful intimate life ever since.

 

 

 


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